I could lie and say that this post came to me in a dream or an epiphany but I won’t lie. After reading Stuff White People Like and Stuff Educated Black People Like, I thought to myself, “That looks fun. I should do that.” So here we are. We begin with one of my favorites……….

Why say large when you can say monumental?

Why say water when you can say H20?

Why call it sleeping sickness when you can call it trypanosomiasis?

The African will take every opportunity they can, whether asked to or not, to prove that they are better educated and more eloquent than you. Ensure that you keep your dictionary handy because a conversation with an African is not complete unless he can stretch out a two syllable word into an eight syllable extravaganza.

Here you must be tactful. You must feign amazement (you see it happens to me too ) even though you think he is basically blowing grandiloquent smoke (there I go again) out of his melanin filled rear.

Don’t pretend to be too blown away though! This may come off as patronizing. Always remember that the African is trying to be condescending to you. Once the African is confident that he/she has proven his/her superiority to you, he will be comfortable around you and may even buy you food and drinks.

Sure, they may constantly remind you of how much better they are than you, but it’s free food AND a free vocabulary lesson. Do you really want to pass that up?

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