The Displaced African » African

Top 49 African Musicians

Mwangi — Sat, 31 Jan 2009 14:07:28 +0000

Image by none other than WhiteAfrican.com

Why Have I Created This Post?

NB: I wrote this post about 3-4 months ago, and it has been simmering in my archives for quite a while. Yesterday I realized, this probably wasn’t the type of post that should remain in the archives, ….so enjoy

Each week I try increasing traffic to my blog by attempting new means. Some time ago I realized that my blog and I have been blessed because our readers have promoted us by word-of-mouth. Media appearances on this blog are examples of our good fortune.

But How to Encourage and Advance Word-of-Mouth Promotion?

I believe that list articles are “cool” and that just about everyone from lands of the ebony-skinned appreciates and loves music.

So I decided to experiment with an article of such format and I hope that you, my esteemed readers, would be kind enough to spread the word among all your friends on Facebook or through email. However, do that ONLY IF you think that it is enjoyable, entertaining, informative and worth discussing and sharing.

And for that I thank you in advance.

1) Zangalewa

I have no idea what this Cameroonian marching band was talking about and neither do millions of people throughout Africa. That, however, did not stop us from absolutely loving and adoring them — a true testament to the fact that good music has no linguistic barriers.

The following words were a huge part of millions of African children’s lives,

“Zamina! Zamina! Zamina!
Tibeee!Zangalewa!”

2) Nameless
It all began when a man by the name of David Mathenge tried to compete in a Kenyan radio contest but could not think of a name for himself. So, to be named or to remain “Nameless” was the big question? Since then he had produced an endless stream of hits, one successful year after another and so on and on. You have to admit that an artist is gifted when blatant people such as Jamali have the audacity to steal his song and it still becomes a hit.

“Nameless” David Mathenge is also, in fact, a magnificent live performer.

3) Malaika

One of the most successful singing bands in African history is Malaika. They are world-class vocalists who continually take their Kwaito beat to the top of musical charts, and their legendary live performances wow audiences.

All the hype and eloquent accolades you have ever heard about Malaika are well deserved and then some. But do not merely take my word for it. Check out the track below and I challenge you to look me straight in the eye and tell me that they are not talented.

Check out their bios here.

4) Fela Kuti
All an entertainer ever really needs is one great gimmick to perpetually be cemented in the minds of his or her listeners.

Fela Kuti was born and raised and later made his fame and was tremendously revered in Nigeria. However, younger Africans outside of Nigeria will forever remember him as the man who took the expression, “Bang! Bang!” (no guns are involved here, by the way) and turned it into an international musical hit.

Fela Kuti, the Afrobeat legend, is one of the most influential musicians in history with eccentricity to match his fame.

5) Kanda Bongo Man
As one of many soukouss musicians on this list, Kanda Bongo Man has now fallen off the charts to make room for newer artists but he was definitely a multi-faceted icon in the past. To young Africans, this singing and dancing star from the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) was what Michael Jackson is to the young in America. To women, Mr. “kwassa Kwassa” was a sex symbol.

Check out his Wikipedia page here.

6) Youssou N’Dour
He is one of the few African artists who has managed to transcend the beautiful sub-continent and become a true international superstar. If you are having a large global event and you want an African megastar, call on N’Dour.

The extent of his success is marked by topping the charts in the mecca of music, the United States, when he produced the track “7 Seconds” with Neneh Cherry.

Check out his official website.

7) Mr. Nice
The landscape of East African music can not be spoken of without mentioning the sweet, mellifluous Bongo flavored “dish.” With his native language being Kiswahili, Mr. Nice is a legend who rocked everyone in East Africa from Dar es Salam to Kampala.

This talented ex-gardener from Zanzibar is included in this article because he is one of the pioneers of the “Takeu style” that is so prevalent in Tanzania, Kenya and Uganda. His lyrics, such as “Kuku kapanda baiskeli” which literally means the hen climbed the bicycle, are misunderstood by listeners outside of Tanzania but they were, nevertheless, appreciated for their humor and entertainment factor.

8 ) Miriam Makeba
The grandmother of African music and quite possibly the most successful person on the list, Mrs. Makeba is famous for, among other things, being one of the musical voices against Apartheid. In addition, together with Harry Belafonted, she is credited for creating an international hit out of the Kiswahili song “Malaika” as well as her own billboard chart topper, “Pata Pata”.

Exceptfor Mobutu, she has the longest name I have ever seen. Check out her Wikipedia page here.

Below is, in my opinion, one of the greatest tracks Makeba had ever made.

9) Koffi Olomide

The DRC man with the velvety deep voice whom I will forever remember for teaching me an alternative use for handkerchiefs — pull them out and wave them from side to side as you slowly ride the lingala beat.

He has had an abundance of hits including “Andrada” and “Effrakata”, and is yet another legendary musician who solidified the reputation and popularity of soukous/rumba/lingala.

Since I do not speak his language, I can enjoy the music and the visual performance without being exposed to the content of his lyrics which are reputed to be quite vulgar.

10) 2face Idibia
This man made his reputation as one of sub-Sahara’s greats when he came out with the ode to African women entitled “African queen.” He has sold millions of albums in his home of Naija, topped charts throughout Africa and is one of the few artists to catch the eye of the Koras, Platinum success and MTV music awards, though of course the Kora meant the most .

Check out the remixed version of “African Queen.”

11) Angela Kidjo
This Benin songstress is another artist who far transcended the bounds of the African continent to become an international superstar. Her hits include “Agolo,” “Ayé,” and “Batonga.”

If you need an international African star to work with Joss Stone or open for Josh Groban, Angela may just be your answer.

Check out her Wikipedia page here.

12) Brenda Fassie

The late great Fassie is a legendary songstress who will be sorely missed not only in the shacks of South Africa but all over the world. This woman had a mesmerizing charisma that she brought to all her stage appearances. Her talent was only matched by her capriciousness and, at times, self-destructive behavior.

East and Central Africans will forever remember her for bridging the African gap by singing in Kiswahili in the track, “Nakupenda!”

13) Jua Cali
When in 2000 Jua Cali joined forces with a man named Clemo they did not just create a different sound, they created the Genge movement which defines a large segment of East African music. Although Genge lyrics fall far behind those of Shakespeare, their talents and ability to rock audiences all over the world are undeniable.

Jua Cali has been recognized by many awards committees widely spanning from Chaguo la Teeniez in Kenya to the MOBOs of London.

14) Magic System
Some recording artists have to build entire careers to be remembered as part of Africa’s soundtrack while others produce just one track that is so hot, that not only does everyone in Africa program it on their rewind selector to be listened to over and over again, but it is also recognized as an African classic around the globe.

Magic System managed to do just that with their song “Gauo” which has come to mean many things to many different people. In Kenya, for instance, this song is called “Taulo” which means towel.

15) Awilo Longomba
Awilo is another one of the bigger-than-life soukous artists who comes out of the DRC and sings lyrics which would probably not be sanctioned by my church leaders. In his videos, this artist has broken every fashion etiquette imaginable. But, having produced the hot tracks that Awilo had, redefining fashion is quite acceptable.

“Je ma pelle, comma tuta pelle.” Yes, my years of studying French were useless but you have to admit that you too learned some of it when Awilo released the track below.

16) STL

STL represents the type of artist who can only exist in this age of globalization because she has earned the admiration and love of the African community while living most of her life outside of Africa.

This young woman raps from Norway and embeds messages into her rhyming lyrics as is evident in her track “Makelele” which was released in the midst of the Kenyan election violence.

17) Oliver “Tuku” Mtukudzi
Until I landed in Australia I had never heard of Tuku. Once I did, it became clear that the man is a legend. A demi-deity in his land of Zimbabwe, Mtukudzi has had a long, prolific career as an artist, musician, social commentator and a political activist.

He has collaborated with younger African artists such as Eric Wainaina, and a ticket to one of his shows costs enough to feed an impoverished family for a long while.

Find more information on him at Tuku Music.

18) Kalamashaka

It is often said that “a man will never forget his first.” The people of East Africa will probably never forget these brothers who first came out of the ghettos of Kenya and brought to light a new form of art: Hip Hop in their national language Kiswahili. Every other Hip Hop artist who has since rapped in Kiswahili owes a debt to the pioneering of Kalamashaka who have done everything from recording in Sweden to working with international acts such as Dead Prez.

19) Papa Wemba
An absolute legend in the world of soukous, Papa is yet another musician who has transcended his art and became a phenomenon larger than any country or continent could contain. Papa Wemba will forever be special to me for his smooth, seductive and high pitched voice. Who would have ever thought that those three adjectives could go together when referring to a male vocalist?

He may have seen his share of hard times, but do not let that diminish your enjoyment and admiration for this great pioneer in the world of rumba.

20) Yvonne Chaka Chaka
This is yet another great South African artist who has been part of the soundtrack of millions of African youths.

Until I started researching this article, I hadn’t even realized that I had heard the song Umqombothi before. I am certain that many of you, outside of South Africa, will also recognize it although you may not know that it is Umqombothi that you are listening to. And, according to SABC3 , she is one of the greatest South Africans. Visit:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SABC3%27s_Great_South_Africans.

Check out her website which is appropriately called Princess of Africa. And, by the way, don’t you think she looks phenomenal in this picture?

21) African Americans

Africans have a real love-hate relationship with their cousins in the United States. You will rarely hear of Africans who traveled to the United States and came back with NO emotional reactions or even neutral ones toward their American brothaz and sistaz or niggaz and bitches, depending on who you talk to. They either absolutely love them or utterly despise them.

Furthermore, there is no denying that with the might of the American economy behind them, African Americans are probably the most powerful cultural force in human history — and not just in music and dance although their greatest prominence is undeniable in those areas. African Americans starting with the songs of slavery and the underground railroad and continuing on to the Negro spirituals, the Blues, the Jazz, the rock and roll all the way to the R&B and Hip Hop of today. Let us give credit where credit is due — our cousins are cultural champions.

22) Jose Chameleone
If you think that promoting the arts in primary and high schools is ridiculous, think again. And if you are still not convinced, Chameleone can very easily prove you wrong. Getting his own start in a school music competition, this Ugandan now sits at the peak of his success throughout East Africa. It all started at the turn of the millennium when he joined forces with Redsan (also on this list) to create the track Bageya.

One year later, he collaborated with the production powerhouse, Ogopa DJs, and recorded the mega Kiswahili hit, Mama Mia. Since then he has expanded and diversified to work with Swahili Nation, Bebe Cool and even moved further South and generated music for the Zimbambwan market.

23) Mandoza
Mduduzi Tshabalala was born in Soweto in 1978 and, according to an SABC poll, is ranked as the 77th greatest individual in South Africa.

His raspy voice has resulted in a multi-platinum status and a crossover appeal among white as well as black music lovers in South Africa. He has toured all over the world and even paid a visit to Australia.

24) E-sir:
He is quite possibly the most successful music artist that Kenya has ever spawned. E-sir is a native of the South C estate who distinguished himself from his fellow youth in Nairobi by taking command and acquiring fluency in Kiswahili, both on and off the mic.

He only released one album prior to his premature demise, but that album is an impressive collection of highly admired modern African music and had since become tremendously respected as well as commercially successful.

25) Lucky Dube
He is the greatest reggae musician to come out of Africa but was tragically gunned down in October of 2007. This artistic native of South Africa released deeply poignant and socioeconomically relevant music for more than 20 years.

Lucky Dude achieve something that only a truly great artist can — he gained respect and loving admiration of people from all over the world. Even American rapper Nas lamented his death when he addressed an extraordinarily diverse audience.

Check out his official site and below is a favorite of mine.

26) Sarafina
“Sarafina” started out as a stage show written by Mbongeni Ngema. The musical, which was based on the Soweto Uprisings of 1976, was eventually converted into a successful Hollywood movie of the same name.

Growing up, this movie made a huge impact on me as it did on many other youths. Countless children and adolescents around the world were heard singing “Freedom is coming tomorrow” in the early 1990s.

The Broadway show and the Hollywood movie made Leleti Khumalo a star.

Check out the Sarafina IMDB Page Here.

27) Watoto Children’s Choir

This group of young, impoverished youngsters from Uganda was assembled by Pastor’s Gary and Marilyn Skinner. Besides the entertainment factor, the Watoto Children’s Choir makes two significant statements:

1) A geopolitical statement and the relationship between Africa, its citizens, the Western world and foreign aide.

2) A simpler statement of fact that a group of young talented kids can sing and move adult audiences to tears.

28) Soweto Gospel Choir

I had the pleasure and good fortune to see this amazing troupe when they performed in Melbourne, Australia as part of their international tour. I had already displayed my groupie-love and expressed my admiration for the vocal talents of South Africans but my appreciation increased when I first saw the stage show, “Gumboots,” where the Gumboot dance was performed. To top it all off, the Soweto Gospel Choir heightened my demeanor to a state of utter awe. Today, I have no doubt that South African performers are head and shoulders above the rest of Africa.

Find their official website right here.

29) Akon

Why does he call himself the Polish Prince? Feel free to share your answer if you have one.

Akon is one of the few global superstars whose video, “Don’t Matter,” is the most watched videos in Youtube history (displayed below).

His life, his African heritage and roots, are completely out in the open and discussed often by many. I don’t think I need to go into too much detail about Akon — there is enough information about him out on the Internet: the good as well as the bad.

30) Daudi Kabaka
The sadly late Daudi Kabaka is one of the great foundations upon which East African music is built. We may at times forget to appreciate those who came before us but we really shouldn’t.

He was a Zilizopendwa a.k.a. a classic in every sense of the word.

31) Vusi Mahlasela
Sometimes there’s a need to talk while at other times there’s a need to just shut up and listen.

This guy is the soul music man! Shhhhhhh! Listen!

32) Hugh Masekela
Hugh is one of the patriarchs of South African music. Besides being a former husband of Miriam Makeba, he is also one of the creative forces behind Queen Makeba’s success. And all that is just an added bonus to his own absolutely amazing musical career.

I love when stories are told in music. Below, Hugh tells a story about the trains that took African workers away from their children to go work as peons in the apartheid system.

Get a drink, pull up a chair and enjoy both, the video and the audio.

33) Cheering squads, rioters and protestors

There would be no African music without mobs that either sang and chanted whenever the-powers-that-be acted up or chanted and sang during every sports event.

That is a simple fact and there is no need to further expound on it.

34) Redsan
I would call this ragga MC a Kenyan artist, but he’s been an Afropolitan star who’s been performing mainly outside Africa for so long that this would almost be a lie. He is one of the few artists who started at home, acquired international fame and is now signed up with a label in the granddaddy of music, the United States of America. Or maybe it is India? I intuitively suspect that India may have higher annual sales, but do any of you have more accurate inside information?

His most recent videos, of course, reflects his move to a much more “cash fluid” label.

35) The men who serenade their women

Where would we be without classic tracks like Malaika and African Queen? This reminds us, brothaz, that women can be quite silly and drive us nuts but that’s kinda why we like them. And let us never forgedt that we also like them for their physical beauty, their sexiness, their nurturing aptitude, their appreciation for aesthetics, their femininity and so on and on and on.

The song in the track below is sung by Miss Kidjo but it’s actually a Kiswahili song about a man who is singing to the woman he loves.

36) Nonini

Here is one more Kenyan artist who comes from the music powerhouse that is Calif Records. Though all indications seem to point to the fact that he is currently past his peak, he had probably reached the most magnificent heights in African music.

Bursting onto the music scene with “Manzi wa Nairobi,” Nonini and Jua Cali, a fellow Calif mate, are unashamedly crass as they discuss the day to day life of a young man in Nairobi. Thus, the original “bad boy” of Kenyan music with his ridiculous lyrics became an instant East African sex symbol and every parent’s worst nightmare.

We…we….we….we….kamu! Check out the track below and find his Myspace page here.

37) That kid in your school who can really sing
I don’t think any school in Africa missed out on having at least one kid who always spoke in music. These kids either always had a pen and paper ready for writing lyrics, perpetually walked with a certain rhythm in their steps or, best of all, endlessly regaled everyone with ditties or rap songs.

Jose Chameleone started doing exactly that. Below is the kid I went to school with and the one who always had his “rap rhyme” pen and paper handy and never failed to put them to good use.

38) South Africans

I don’t know if proximity to white people who keep beating you down is a natural performance enhancer, but I do know that South Africans are the best vocalists and musicians Africa has to offer. The South African contribution to the list before you include Malaika, Fassie, Makeba, Masekela and Chakachaka.

I invite you to witness this phenomenon yourself by listening to some music that was part of the anti-apartheid struggle or just pick up a gospel CD recorded by any South African vocalist.

Although the song below is actually about wanting to do very bad things to someone, it will surely make you want to “jam.”

39) Swahili Nation
These guys had to be included in my list because of the quality of their videos. They formed their band in Kenya and attained tremendous success around the turn of the century with the single “Hakuna Matata.”

They had been unable to replicate this massive success, but, from their very beginnings, they have always produced world-class videos and their talents have always been apparent.

40) The Women of Africa
If you have never heard a group of women sing together then you haven’t lived yet, my friend. The blending of their altos and sopranos into high pitched sounds that are still mellow, is an experience to behold.

The Kenyan national anthem is based on a Pokomo lullaby and most songs in their churches are customized to be delivered by God’s most beautiful creation — woman. In honor of women, I shall post the first image ever on the website dedicated to the Displaced African (tDA).

41) Soulfege

On the 14th and 15th of July 2008, I interviewed a member of these Afropolitan gems, D.N.A. aka Derrick Ashong. Rather than hearing about it from me, I am sure that you would much rather listen to the main man, Derrick, speak for himself.

Join their Facebook group here, and don’t forget to share this article with your friends while you’re there.

42) Lokua Kanza

From Wikipedia: Lokua Kanza (born April 1958) is a singer, songwriter and composer from the Democratic Republic of the Congo. He is known for his soulful, folksy sound, which is atypical of the dance-floor friendly soukous music that is so common in the Congo.

Check out his official website here.

43) Conscious rappers

This article could not be complete without talking about socially conscious rappers who have had a huge impact on many African lives, including my own. I am referring to musicians like Tribe Called Quest and Dead Prez who consciously cultivated a relationship with Mother Africa and showed her all the love and respect that she deserves. Being a child of Africa’s soil, I am sending my love right back.

44) Bob Marley
Approach any African and try to convince him or her that Bob isn’t one of us. Come on, I dare you! Bob has always been and will continue to be in the hearts of Africans for a very long time.

I know that absolutely everyone reading this article has sat in a quite room in the company of good friends and sang, “No woman, no cry! I remember when we used to sit in a …”

45) Eric Wainaina
Eric Wainaina has achieved much that sets him apart as a great artist. First of all, he has been a globally revered musician for over a decade. Secondly, he created his own niche and style of music that is now being imitated all over Kenya and he has composed music for stage productions, for musical marathons and for other entertainment events.

He is one of the greats of African soul and jazz with true substance to his lyrics.

For more information visit his home online or just buy his albums on iTunes.

46) Afro-Latinos

Until I came to Australia, I didn’t even know that there are people of African descent living in Central and South America who established a history there. Among many other things, they also created my favorite martial arts in Brazil: Capoeira.

By the way, notice how much the song above sounds like soukkous. Don’t quote me on that, but I seem to vaguely remember reading that the two stem from the same source. Sounds like it might be true, don’t you agree?

47) Makoma

Let’s infuse some gospel into the mix. I first heard this DRC band during the World Cup Games in 2002. All you need to hear is the commanding opening of the track, Butu Na Moyi, to know that you are in for a true listening experience.

Seriously, there must be something in the drinking water south of the equator because this band has some ridiculously well controlled, emotionally fluid, take-you-high vocals.

48) Milele

I recently read an article in the Kenyan Jewels and was reminded that I used to be a fan of this Kenyan Gospel group based in the United States. This set me in a nostalgic mood and I also recalled having been a huge fan of yet another a capella band many years ago, Five Alive.

This one is for all the guys you ever listened to from your past until today, when Milele are rocking audiences as far away from home as Pasadena, California.

49) You tell me

I reserve this last slot for you. If you were moved in any way by this article, share it with your friends on Facebook and then come back to tell me which musical acts have been the soundtrack of your life. Which artists rocked your world?

Every Immigrant Has A Story Like This

Mwangi — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 18:03:17 +0000

I wrote this piece a while back and submitted it to one of the big blogs in the African blogosphere in the hopes of being published as a guest author. But alas, I felt the sting of rejection On the bright side, this piece gets published anyway ….and since there are a whole bunch of you new readers, I would like to welcome you with a tale of one of my experiences from my early days of Australian life. If you enjoy the peace, make sure you leave a comment with a little anecdote of your own.

Five weary travellers rested their behinds on the isn’t-this-a-four-star-restaurant-why-are-they-giving-us-two-star seats. It had been a tiring, but exciting day. The travellers hailed from the land known as Africa (Cradle of civilization since the dawn of time, thank you very much). They had thoroughly enjoyed their day spent walking around, gawking and poking at these weird human beings known as Australians.

Weird creatures they were. Instead of speaking with their mouth like normal people, their words seemed to come from the end of the throat. They claimed to speak the language made famous by the Queen, but for some weird reason everything that came out of their mouth sounded like

“Robo, Yobo, Yeeennooouuuu mate!”

“Mate!”

That was the only word they had heard all day and they liked it:

“Mate!”

So as their backsides rested upon the varnished wood seats and they stared in bewilderment at the excess of spoons on the table (aren’t soup and food are eaten with the same spoon?..you must transfer flavour man) a “mate” of theirs came.

“Hello mate!” They all crooned like an out of tune choir

“Hello!” chirped a bright eyed, black haired girl. She looked like an Amber, so let’s call her, “like so totally Amber, Oh my God!”

Hmmm, the Africans knew they needed time to balance out their need to eat with their need to save as much money as possible. So they decided in the interim that image really was nothing and thirst was everything.

The matriarch of the group, confident as an MP declaring on national television that he will beat up his colleague, stepped up to be the first to speak to future cheerleader, Amber.

“I would like some juice!”

Amber stopped stunned! I would say she looked like a deer in the headlights but in truth she looked like the deer after being hit by a car as it flew through the air wondering what just happened.

“What?”

“Oh sorry, I want some juice!”

Amber’s eyes rolled into the back of her head looking for some form of truth in the woman’s words but came up short. Amber decided it was time to try and speak to this weird African woman:

“Did you say you want grease?”

“Juice!”

“Feet?”

“Juice!”

“Jebeet!”

“Dear Lord!” Exclaimed the woman and in her native tongue tried to calm her family, “Don’t worry, this woman is a retard. We need to speak to her in sign language.”

And so in that moment, the family engaged in their first ever miming group performance: They lifted their hands to their mouths. End of act 1. They opened their mouths. End of Act 2 With the smoothness of an impotent Marlboro man, they concluded the act by motioning for drinks to enter their mouths.

“Juice! Juice! Juice! Ya kukunywa! Ya kunyua!Drinking! Sippy! Sippy!” They all said in an effort to get a message through to the mentally challenged girl.

Finally, success. Her eyes glowed with the magnificence of an ember of fire that was just about to die but had just sparked back to life in its final moments.

“OOOOOOOOhhhhh”

“Oooooohhhhh,” the family said, thinking it was a round song.

“You want Juuuuuusssss!”

Everyone in the family restrained their urge to speak. They saw just what the matriach was talking about: poor girl, I wonder how they allow her to work with such a debilitating condition. She couldn’t even pronounce basic words.

“Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!” They all nodded in Unison.

And five minutes later, the lady brought some Juuuuuusss.

And with that ended the drama that was their fast day in this fresh new land. That episode quickly and easily made way for the drama that was still to come. Good times!

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The Afropolitan in You

Mwangi — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 17:04:52 +0000

Hello,

You know this article applies almost exactly to me. Though at present I am not a very big fan of esoteric or linguistically complex and philosophical pieces of writing, i.e. I like to dumb things down and like people who do the same, I can’t deny that this piece is introducing an idea that’s definitely one that’s worth thinking about and exploring through more pieces of writing, books, films etc. People like us African immigrants are an entirely unique entity unto ourselves and its time we began talking about our Afropolitan nature. Enjoy!

NB: I have quoted text from this blog post verbatim

What exactly is an “Afropolitan”?

Taiye Tuakli-Wosornu’s piece, pretty much inspired the very creation of this blog.

Bye-Bye Babar

by Taiye Tuakli-Wosornu

It’s moments to midnight on Thursday night at Medicine Bar in London. Zak,
boy-genius DJ, is spinning a Fela Kuti remix. The little downstairs
dancefloor swells with smiling, sweating men and women fusing hip-hop
dance moves with a funky sort of djembe. The women show off enormous
afros, tiny t-shirts, gaps in teeth; the men those incredible torsos
unique to and common on African coastlines. The whole scene speaks of
the Cultural Hybrid: kente cloth worn over low-waisted jeans; ‘African
Lady’ over Ludacris bass lines; London meets Lagos meets Durban meets
Dakar. Even the DJ is an ethnic fusion: Nigerian and Romanian; fair,
fearless leader; bobbing his head as the crowd reacts to a sample of
‘Sweet Mother’.

Were you to ask any of these beautiful, brown-skinned people that
basic question – ‘where are you from?’ – you’d get no single answer
from a single smiling dancer. This one lives in London but was raised
in Toronto and born in Accra; that one works in Lagos but grew up in
Houston, Texas. ‘Home’ for this lot is many things: where their parents
are from; where they go for vacation; where they went to school; where
they see old friends; where they live (or live this year). Like so many
African young people working and living in cities around the globe,
they belong to no single geography, but feel at home in many.

They (read: we) are Afropolitans – the newest generation of African
emigrants, coming soon or collected already at a law firm/chem lab/jazz
lounge near you. You’ll know us by our funny blend of London fashion,
New York jargon, African ethics, and academic successes. Some of us are
ethnic mixes, e.g. Ghanaian and Canadian, Nigerian and Swiss; others
merely cultural mutts: American accent, European affect, African ethos.
Most of us are multilingual: in addition to English and a Romantic or
two, we understand some indigenous tongue and speak a few urban
vernaculars. There is at least one place on The African Continent to
which we tie our sense of self: be it a nation-state (Ethiopia), a city
(Ibadan), or an auntie’s kitchen. Then there’s the G8 city or two (or
three) that we know like the backs of our hands, and the various
institutions that know us for our famed focus. We are Afropolitans: not
citizens, but Africans of the world.

It isn’t hard to trace our genealogy. Starting in the 60’s, the
young, gifted and broke left Africa in pursuit of higher education and
happiness abroad. A study conducted in 1999 estimated that between 1960
and 1975 around 27,000 highly skilled Africans left the Continent for
the West. Between 1975 and 1984, the number shot to 40,000 and then
doubled again by 1987, representing about 30% of Africa’s highly
skilled manpower. Unsurprisingly, the most popular destinations for
these emigrants included Canada, Britain, and the United States; but
Cold War politics produced unlikely scholarship opportunities in
Eastern Bloc countries like Poland, as well.

Some three decades later this scattered tribe of pharmacists,
physicists, physicians (and the odd polygamist) has set up camp around
the globe. The caricatures are familiar. The Nigerian physics professor
with faux-Coogi sweater; the Kenyan marathonist with long legs and
rolled r’s; the heavyset Gambian braiding hair in a house that smells
of burnt Kanekalon. Even those unacquainted with synthetic extensions
can conjure an image of the African immigrant with only the slightest
of pop culture promptings: Eddie Murphy’s ‘Hello, Barbar.’ But
somewhere between the 1988 release of Coming to America and the 2001
crowning of a Nigerian Miss World, the general image of young Africans
in the West transmorphed from goofy to gorgeous. Leaving off the
painful question of cultural condescenscion in that beloved film, one
wonders what happened in the years between Prince Akeem and Queen
Agbani?

One answer is: adolescence. The Africans that left Africa between
1960 and 1975 had children, and most overseas. Some of us were bred on
African shores then shipped to the West for higher education; others
born in much colder climates and sent home for cultural
re-indoctrination. Either way, we spent the 80’s chasing after
accolades, eating fufu at family parties, and listening to adults argue
politics. By the turn of the century (the recent one), we were matching
our parents in number of degrees, and/or achieving things our ‘people’
in the grand sense only dreamed of. This new demographic – dispersed
across Brixton, Bethesda, Boston, Berlin – has come of age in the 21st
century, redefining what it means to be African. Where our parents
sought safety in traditional professions like doctoring, lawyering,
banking, engineering, we are branching into fields like media,
politics, music, venture capital, design. Nor are we shy about
expressing our African influences (such as they are) in our work.
Artists such as Keziah Jones, Trace founder and editor Claude
Gruzintsky, architect David Adjaye, novelist Chimamanda Achidie – all
exemplify what Gruzintsky calls the ’21st century African.’

What distinguishes this lot and its like (in the West and at home) is a
willingness to complicate Africa – namely, to engage with, critique,
and celebrate the parts of Africa that mean most to them. Perhaps what
most typifies the Afropolitan consciousness is the refusal to
oversimplify; the effort to understand what is ailing in Africa
alongside the desire to honor what is wonderful, unique. Rather than
essentialising the geographical entity, we seek to comprehend the
cultural complexity; to honor the intellectual and spiritual legacy;
and to sustain our parents’ cultures.

For us, being African must mean something. The media’s portrayals
(war, hunger) won’t do. Neither will the New World trope of bumbling,
blue-black doctor. Most of us grew up aware of ‘being from’ a blighted
place, of having last names from to countries which are linked to lack,
corruption. Few of us escaped those nasty ‘booty-scratcher’ epithets,
and fewer still that sense of shame when visting paternal villages.
Whether we were ashamed of ourselves for not knowing more about our
parents’ culture, or ashamed of that culture for not being more
‘advanced’ can be unclear. What is manifest is the extent to which the
modern adolescent African is tasked to forge a sense of self from
wildly disparate sources. You’d never know it looking at those dapper
lawyers in global firms, but most were once supremely self-conscious of
being so ‘in between’. Brown-skinned without a bedrock sense of
‘blackness,’ on the one hand; and often teased by African family
members for ‘acting white’ on the other – the baby-Afropolitan can get
what I call ‘lost in transnation’.

Ultimately, the Afropolitan must form an identity along at least
three dimensions: national, racial, cultural – with subtle tensions in
between. While our parents can claim one country as home, we must
define our relationship to the places we live; how British or American
we are (or act) is in part a matter of affect. Often unconsciously, and
over time, we choose which bits of a national identity (from passport
to pronunciation) we internalize as central to our personalities. So,
too, the way we see our race – whether black or biracial or none of the
above – is a question of politics, rather than pigment; not all of us
claim to be black. Often this relates to the way we were raised,
whether proximate to other brown people (e.g. black Americans) or
removed. Finally, how we conceive of race will accord with where we
locate ourselves in the history that produced ‘blackness’ and the
political processes that continue to shape it.

Then there is that deep abyss of Culture, ill-defined at best. One
must decide what comprises ‘African culture’ beyond pepper soup and
filial piety. The project can be utterly baffling – whether one lives
in an African country or not. But the process is enriching, in that it
expands one’s basic perspective on nation and selfhood. If nothing
else, the Afropolitan knows that nothing is neatly black or white; that
to ‘be’ anything is a matter of being sure of who you are uniquely. To
‘be’ Nigerian is to belong to a passionate nation; to be Yoruba, to be
heir to a spiritual depth; to be American, to ascribe to a cultural
breadth; to be British, to pass customs quickly. That is, this is what
it means for me – and that is the Afropolitan privilege. The acceptance
of complexity common to most African cultures is not lost on her
prodigals. Without that intrinsically multi-dimensional thinking, we
could not make sense of ourselves.

And if it all sounds a little self-congratulatory, a little
‘aren’t-we-the-coolest-damn-people-on-earth?’ – I say: yes it is,
necessarily. It is high time the African stood up. There is nothing
perfect in this formulation; for all our Adjayes and Achidies, there is
a brain drain back home. Most Afropolitans could serve Africa better in
Africa than at Medicine Bar on Thursdays. To be fair, a fair number of
African professionals are returning; and there is consciousness among
the ones who remain, an acute awareness among this brood of
too-cool-for-schools that there’s work to be done. There are those
among us who wonder to the point of weeping: where next, Africa? When
will the scattered tribes return? When will the talent repatriate? What
lifestyles await young professionals at home? How to invest in Africa’s
future? The prospects can seem grim at times. The answers aren’t
forthcoming. But if there was ever a group who could figure it out, it
is this one, unafraid of the questions.

To hear more from the Afropolitan blogger known as Mwangi, make sure you stay subscribed to the Displaced African via RSS or email.

7 Pieces of the Puzzle that Africa Has

Mwangi — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 17:29:26 +0000

As you will probably notice I am currently in the process of creating my email newsletter. It is going to be the latest permanent addition to this little blog so any advice on how to make my email newsletter better is very appreciated….oh and of course join it . To today’s program:

Greetings, salutations and hello. Today’s article is a special treat for me and hopefully for you. It is yet another post that pretty much evolved over the course of a day as opposed to a preplanned article, which is always very very cool.

So a few months ago I was visiting this elderly couple in Country Victoria. In their home, which is absolutely gorgeous for a 100 year old house, they had this puzzle: The puzzle was a mix between a rubix cube and a jigsaw puzzle. You get a cube that is open on one end, a bunch of haphazardly shaped wooden pieces and you are basically meant to fit all those pieces perfectly into the box.

As our brains sweat through the task, someone suggested that I should write a blog post about the puzzle. I thought to myself:

” I own the Displaced African domain, so why not?!”

Today I thought I would share with you 7 elements that I believe that Africa has that are far from being used to their maximum effect. These are 7 elements that we can use to take Africa from the gutter that we currently are in, all the way to the stars and beyond. Without further ado, they are:

1) Pain and Suffering

We have had a recent history filled with nothing but tragedy after tragedy. But we do not use tragedy to move our country forward. When Kenya was bombed in 1998, the reaction of our country was far different to that of the States. The US has mourned, established memorials, investigated 9/11 to the littlest detail, had all media talking about 9/11 and it’s implications, made movies, wrote books, got think tanks working overtime, used it as justification to go protect their interests overseas etc etc etc

They basically did everything imaginable to not only ensure it never happens again, but they emerge stronger as a result. Pain and suffering a lot of the time can be the greatest motivation to get to work and make the world a better place. In Africa we have more than enough to motivate us. Sadly a lot of the time we direct it at each other instead of at solving the root cause of the problem as is the case in South Africa at the moment.

2) Cultural Richness

I have spoken about this many many many times but we really should have had a discussion as a society, post colonialism about how we’d handle some of the important parts of the human experience including the only thing that comes guaranteed with life: death.

In my humble opinion, the way some African cultures handled death was grossly superior to the Western ways we inherited of handling death. The Ashanti didn’t mourn death but viewed it as an inevitable part of life. The Luo people keep the corpse in the dead person’s home and hire professional wailers and mourners to ensure that all the grieving that needs to be done is done as soon as possible. During this time, any debts or scores of the deceased that need to be settled are settled as everyone in the community is given a chance to come and speak to the family members. And then to ensure that, if its a man, his wife and children are taken care of, a member of the family takes the wife and children into his home.

To me, there are a lot of things in those two approaches that strike me as a very healthy way of viewing death. We had a lot of customs and traditions from 1000s of tribes in Africa that were clearly working for a certain period of time…foolish is the man who doesn’t learn or even bother examining his past.

3) Work Ethic

It doesn’t matter where you go or who you speak to, nine times out of 10, Africans are praised for our ability to work and work very hard. That’s why you almost never hear of African people who immigrate overseas and end up poor, destitute and/or homeless. Caught up in the rat race? perhaps. Living beyond their means? perhaps. But Africans tend to work themselves like work horses regardless.

Sure we have our fair share of lazy folk, but we have enough hard workers that it counts.

4) Natural Resources

Say what you will, but Africa is the richest natural resource on Earth. The Scramble for Africa took place because the colonial barbarians kept drooling at just how resource rich our continent was. Needless to say, Africa is currently being exploited and stripped and robbed at an exponential pace. BUT, we still have enough natural resources that it counts.

5) Educated People

Africa is one of those odd places on Earth where you will find people with Masters degrees walking the streets daily in search of work. As I have shared in the past, we love us some degrees and advanced degrees and it’s knocked into our heads from a very young age that no one goes to success but by Bachelor.

This has resulted in about two or three generations of extremely well trained, academically intelligent people of colour. If we could put all the African brains all over the world into a brain trust, it would probably be the wealthiest brain trust around.

6) Young People

Young people can have two things that make them the most powerful forces known to man:

a) A sense of infinite possibility and a belief that we can bring them to life.

b) No sense of shame.

A lot of people look at point b) as though it’s a negative. I think it’s ridiculously powerful. Sometimes when I get in the train and look at Sudanese teenagers who are acting a fool I think to myself:

These people genuinely don’t care what people think about them. They will act however they want without any fear whatsoever of its social consequences. Can you imagine if they put this lack of inhibition and thick skins to constructive use?

It’s no secret that to cause massive changes or bring something new to society you need a thick skin. As Tony Robbins once said, when a new idea comes into society,

First it’s ridiculed and chastised. Then it’s violently opposed. And then it’s accepted as truth that was dismissed by crazy people.

Take points a) and b) above, mix them together and you see why so many of the great movements had young people in them.

7) People in the Diaspora

I think I have discussed this one and will continue to discuss if for a very long time and so I see no need to go over it because while reading some of the above points, I know you have seen some of the ways, we in the diaspora can be a powerful force for good.

So what we will do with this power, is entirely up to us, but make no mistake about it, the power is there.

There you have it, seven things that I believe that Africa has going for it.

To stay a part of the conversations in the Displaced African, please stay a part of the email list or add the Displaced African to your feed reader.

Be blessed and bless others,

Mwangi

Stuff African People Like: Their Solutions to Africa’s Problems

Mwangi — Tue, 27 May 2008 17:04:13 +0000

There is no gathering of African people anywhere around the world that doesn’t include the customary discussion of just what is wrong with Africa and how to fix it.

Don’t get me wrong though, it is far from a democratic discussion. The philosophy that gets the most airtime in the imaginations of the listeners is that of the loudest most dominant person. Sad to say, the expression that “empty vessels make the most noise” isn’t just a coffee mug logo: a lot of the time it’s true.

Sometimes however one is surprised by the quiet person in the group who proposes something like,

” We should take all the members of the (insert group they don’t like living in the country) and kick them out or use them for genetic testing.”

A key component of these bar room/church crusade/casual gathering strategy and philosophy sessions is no action must come out of them. For you see if the African knew they had to act on everything they said, they would feel a lot less free to share.

Therefore should you ever engage in these conversations with members of the continent be sure to:

a) Marvel at the brilliance of the most popular opinion. There is no need for you to give any form of input: By now it should be clear that the African is simply content seeming smarter than you. So make sure you acknowledge them as you would Einstein if you were there when he created the theory of relativity.

b) Whenever they discuss the African problems be sure to leer and express disgust at whatever outside force the speaker claims are responsible for Africa’s woes-other ethnic group, white man, politicians, women,men etc etc. Honestly you cannot go wrong with, “Satan is a liar,“, thrown into the mix every so often.

c) NEVER EVER EVER EVER propose or even think about putting any of these ideas into action. If you begin thinking or acting in that direction, Africans will quickly kick you out of their gathering: after all the African is talking to you to feel all smart and powerful, not to act or be held accountable: that’s just too much work and time taken away from making money, rising through the ranks and garnering degrees.

To explore the mind of the African a little deeper make sure you return here every day or stay updated by RSS or email to stay in touch.

I Need Your Help

Mwangi — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 17:04:37 +0000

Hello hello hello,

I got to thinking recently and said to myself:

It would be really cool if one of my readers wrote a guest post.

So, in short, that is what I need help with. Now as I write this, I have already contacted a few of you and asked if you are ready, willing and able to contribute a guest post to tDA. Now I see some of you asking,

But Mwangi, whatever shall I write about?

I Am Glad You Asked

Seeing as this is the blog dedicated to happiness and peace of mind of Africans in the diaspora AND a lot of y’all, actually most of you reading, are in the diaspora, I would love to know about your experiences and especially the things you have learned along the way. Some of the formats that this article can take are:

a) Top 7 Things I Have Learned Living in Sydney/ Boston/ Coppanhagen etc etc

b) The Story of the Day You Knew You Were an African Immigrant

c) Story of a Day You Triumphed Over Adversity

d) Whatever you feel about writing about, as long as it teaches other people something.

But What If I Am Shy About Talking About Myself

If that is the case, then allow me to recommend that you write a rebuttal post to one of my more controversial posts. Feel free to call me a naive, badly chopped, lemon-head if you please, as long as your rebuttal helps other people. The more controversial posts in the history of the Displaced African are:

a) Jungle Fever: The Relationship Between African Men and White Women

b) Promiscuity Making a Man a Stud and a Woman a Whore IS NOT a Double Standard. Here’s Why?

c) The Empty Symbol That is Barrack Obama

d) For the Ladies: Stop Complaining

Anyway, I am really looking forward to seeing what people can come up with. My first ever guest post, 7 Barriers to an Immigrant’s Success, did very well and is one of the most read articles in the history of this blog.

Let me sign off here by saying:

If you are tempted by the idea and not quite sure whether or not you should. DO IT! I had no idea what I was doing when I first started writing this blog, but in retrospect it’s turned out pretty OK. Plus, I do not bite

To finish off: You see, people aren’t only ignorant about the complexity of Africa. Watch below and be amazed! Thanks Caustic Blonde for bringing this brilliant piece of television to my attention.

Be blessed and bless others,

Mwangi

My Story as an African Immigrant:Part five

Mwangi — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 15:38:46 +0000

Before you read this, make sure you have read: Part one, Part two, Part three and Part four of my African immigrant story.

PART FIVE

Late 2006

The film school that I was my first choice University accepts me and I jump straight in to the course in the middle of the school year.

My focus is still all on the party and I fail every single subject including documetary film making where I try to make a film on African drinking habits while drunk.

Still have delusions of grandeur. Obsess over them almost every waking minute but doing nothing to move closer to them. They’re slowly fading away.

Discover that with male-female relationships once a certain level of emotional comfort and physical intimacy has been reached, you are no longer “just friends or acquantances.” It’s as though you own a piece of each other. I discover this when I try to get intimate with two women at the same time and remain “just friends”. Messy and immature. To both of them: I’m sorry.

When my family returns from visiting Kenya they find bottles of alcohol, condoms, pregnancy kits, holes in the walls and morning after pills. Gives you an idea of the type of Christmas I had.

Party lifestyle for me hits its peak probably around June, slow decline has already begun.

Early 2007

The life of hedonism becomes less and less exciting for me.

Rejoin film school and actually try to do well this semester. Make a short film, which you can check out on Youtube.

Learn the basics of film such as editing, using a camera and writing a script. Idea of building a Pan-African movie production company continues to grow.

Attend PUA workshops(Google it!). Fascinating. Become obsessed with their literature and their way of thinking and viewing the world.Eventually become jaded by their general lack of fulfillment in life and an underlying misogyny and fear of women that I detect.

Meet three women who I genuinely like because of their kind hearts and genuine spirits-and they are pretty hot too: One of them hardly remembers me and the other two hate me.

Second Half 2007

I am completely disillusioned and bored with my party lifestyle. In my quiet moments, my delusions of grandeur thrust themselves in my face.

After watching a T Robbins interview with Larry King I decide to take drastic action. I disconnect my phone number and in no time flat, with a little money take off for Sydney to make my production house come true.

Sign up to join a film school that is also a production company. They charge $10,000 for a year of study. Knowing that I can’t get parental support for it and with no way of paying the entire amount upfront, I do not enter the school.

Btw should you ever do what I did, it is only corteous to tell the people around you, you are leaving. I left a lot of good people without saying bye or anything. To all of them. I’m sorry.

I remember to always be mindful to thank God for all he has blessed me with.

Around the time I settle into Sydney I get robbed and most of my official documentation is stolen.

I end up homeless and jobless and searching for a job while listening endlessly to personal development tapes in my car.

Eventually, after 5 years, PUA workshops and a lot of experience, I realize that there are simply people in this world that I cannot get along with, hard as I might try and I have to tolerate and respect them.

Drinking begins to become pathetic: I never intended to drink on my own but I end up doing that. One day I go to a girl’s home and abuse the living hell out of her (insecurities, oh insecurities). Shortly after my drinking makes me miss a flight I was supposed to take back to Melbourne to visit the family. Lying alone and hungover in my car the next morning I vow that I will never touch another drop of alcohol and I must learn to live a life where I don’t use it as a crutch: Defining moment!

Attend a Tony Robbins seminar where I get fire shot into my soul and learn a lot of valuable mental skills.

Decide to experiment with eating no animal products. Health benefits abound, I lose 5 kilograms in two days! Lose some puss pimples, stop feeling bloated and feel a slightly higher level of energy Decide to keep going. Still going!

Come back to Melbourne to start up an Internet business because:

a) People making money from Adsense.

b) I control my working life and can work at night (as I am now)

c) I can use it as an excuse to interview people I admire and want to learn from and model.

d) I can use it as a launching pad for my movie production house (stay tuned).

e) I can use it to help people who are just like me: immigrants who showed up here without a roadmap of what to do.

Try to start blogs on Google. Run them for about 3 months.

Register the Displaced African domain name on Wordpress.Sign up for a membership site to learn how to blog as a business and begin working and thinking about the blog night and day.

Become a ferrocious student of the Internet, blogging, Internet marketing and technology. Still a student to this day!

First Half 2008

This chapter is still in the making. All I intend on doing is building a life that will matter long after I have left this Earth. I am not content with simply saying, I came, I lived, I loved and I died. I want to die with pictures of me deeply embedded onto the walls and in the hearts of people throughout Mama Africa, not because I am a great guy-I am not too bad, if you want to know-but because I brought something special to my home that didn’t exist before I brought it. Because I served and lived in some unique way and now Africa is better as a result.

There is so much I have not put into this story that it’s not funny. However I hope this “brief” timeline of my time here in Australia will put a lot of the stuff I say into perpective. Now you know me and now you know my blog. Enjoy your stay and I hope it’s of benefit to you.

Be blessed and bless others,

Mwangi

If you haven’t, please read: Part one / Part two/ Part three/ Part four /

My Story as an African Immigrant:Part Four

Mwangi — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 15:33:59 +0000

Before reading this, please make sure you have read: Part one, Part two and Part three of my story as an African immigrant

PART FOUR

First Half 2005

Get rejected by film school, and too lethargic and lazy to show up for acting school auditions. Get chosen by my third choice University where I am to get a Bachelor of Business (Entrepreneurship).Selected course because my mother has a Masters in it. Follow in parents’ (father had a more general Bachelor of Business) footsteps. Mother asks me if I’m sure I don’t want to pursue acting. I say, “I’ll be alright.”

Among the caliber of people I am with in business school:

a) CEO of Nissan is mentor

b) Young, high flying Entrepreneur is one of the lecturers

c) Have regular successful speakers coming in such as hundred-millionaire Andrew Giles who founded Hitwise.

d) Young people who have been in business successfully for years

Feel I am with good group to learn business. Feel like everyone, including myself, is very tactical about who they associate with.
Make good friends with some Greek guys and help one of them start up a business, which runs to this day.
The other Greek guy introduces me to CDs of Malcolm X. Have began reading leftist literature including Noam Chomsky and he is also a fan so we connect on that.
Join the local Uni Socialist group and begin to learn about the history of grassroot struggle. Only attend one meeting of the group because I still feel lonely.
Become obsessed with reading leftist literature and listening to leftist thinkers such as Noam Chomsky and Michael Parenti.
Silmultaneously begin reading business books such as Richard Richard Branson’s autobiography (If you like business stories, BUY THIS BOOK! Reality is stranger than fiction) and the E-myth by Michael Gerber.
Try reading Karl Marx book, the Communist Manifesto: great ideas in it but kinda boring.
Discover one of my favorite thinkers, theologians and speakers of all time who reaffirms my faith in the church, Erwin Mcmanus.
Decide I eventually want to own my own African production company which I’ll use to push forward a positive Pan-African identity: Defining idea!
Realize I am not too bad at the whole busines thing: Don’t mind writing up marketing and business plans and do it competently. Don’t mind doing the research and the work neccesary to get a business going. Idea of working on a business if I see the sense in it doesn’t scare me: Cool!
Sign up to do play with theatre group where I did the Wizard of Oz.Play the Puppetmaster in Pinnochio. Do a good job. Get nominated for the same award that I lost last year and win!
I finish the semester but not before the loneliness and isolation hits me again (It took me 5 years to discover this is why I kept dropping out and leaving things so cut me some slack. I didn’t know why I was doing what I was doing) and I defer the course.

Second Half 2005

Drop out of school and stay home.
Listen to leftist professors and study the diplomatic history of the US, a bit of UK and a moderate level on Africa.
Discover people such as Biko, Lumumba (Patrice of DRC not the Kenyan lawyer), Nkrumah, MLK, the Black Panthers, Che Guevara, Malcolm X among others who were important to Civil and human rights in the world. Inspired and fascinated by them.
Daily routine for a while: Wake up, listen to leftist thinkers, watch some dvds, cook and sleep.
Begin listening to more and more self help tapes.
I keep on obsessing over plans for my future but have little idea how I will get there. Just feel tired and worn out.
Do my first adult play, where I actually have to kiss a girl (blush, guffaw and draw map of Africa with my feet). Perform it at two short play festivals in country towns. At one of them, get deep connection with audience and can do no wrong on stage. Win award as Best New Actor and get $50 (I’m rolling in it now, lol!).
Try out amateur wrestling and Olympic weightlifting because still obsessed with looking like an Adonis. Don’t feel any human connection at the training institutions.In spite of that, discover two sports I will pursue in future to develop strength and coordination.
In an effort to make money I try to become a door to door salesman of car servicing vouchers. The job isn’t scary at all really. Regardless, I make less than 10 sales over 4 weeks and decide it’s not for me.
Go and get trained as an aged care nurse and begin working immediately. I don’t like the monotony of the job but like talking to old people, they keep it real!
Only friends are my few fantastic Kenyan friends: things about to get a bit shaky though.

Early 2006

My cousins come over from Kenya to study and we have a house full of young people: Chaos ensues.
Almost immediately me and one of my cousins (Big up, K) hit the club scene hard in spite of the fact that we are not that wealthy.
Commonwealth Games in Melbourne. Go to the Village and hang out with the athletes-a lot of them are great guys who are way too obsessed with carnal pursuits. My obsession with drinking and sex begins to hit an exponential upward trijectory. Become an overactive social creature who gatecrashes as many parties as I can.
Rejoin University but end up dropping all of my subjects except an elective subject: Creative writing for which I attend one three hour class every Thursday. Means I only go to school one day a week, spend the rest of the time working as little as possible and partying as hard as possible.
Lose my virgnity when I, and am not even bragging here, have the most fluid flirtation session I will ever have in my life. I am one of six people she is juggling at the time. (Sweet girl, but at this stage of life I want my virginity back!)
Try to become a conniving, manipulative playa type but it really doesn’t suit me too well, and I am too broke to live it up anyway. Though I fool around a few times, I set the record, as far as I know for the man who can “sleep (like with eyes closed and dreams) in the same bed with the most women,” without any physical connection. Expression begins to be formed: “Mwangi boils the water for others to bathe!”
Attend quite a few business seminars where I have the double honour of being the only African and the only person under 30. Learn a lot from some of the finest business thinkers.
Also attend free lectures and talks from a wide variety of thinkers including neuroscience and technology. Learn the expression: “As human beings we all feel as though we are Angels trapped in the bodies of beasts!” Metaphor still resonates with me today.
As a result of being a bad friend and lying to cover for someone else, I lose my best friend. He was a good man, and what I did was wrong (if you are reading this, again, sorry A)

If you haven’t please make sure you read: Part one / Part two/

Continued on: Part four /Part five

My Story as an African Immigrant:Part three

Mwangi — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:28:47 +0000

Before you read this make sure you have read: Part one and Part two of my story as an African immigrant

PART THREE

Second Half 2003

At times I am a very dramatic, loud,flamboyant and entertaining person. Did a few plays back home. Decide to try out for the school production. Get the lead part because the only other person who tried out is in the final year of high school and they don’t want to give him heavy workload. Great vote of confidence there.

My life, without friends and energy of people to feed of, is an empty void. I decide to fill this void by studying and actually trying to pass at school. Begin developing study habits such as reading a paragraph of a book, closing the book, rewriting the paragraph as I understand it and seeing if the two ideas correspond. Some of these habits stay with me to this day: Defining moment.

Studying isn’t enough though I am doing a lot better at school. The loneliness and isloation makes me feel like dropping out again. Drama teacher tells me, “If I want to drop out and live like an adult, then I must be man enough to see the production through.” Decide to stay.

Put myself mind, body and soul into the rehearsal. Hide behind the characters and the music and the play hoping I never have to come out. Begin to shape up into a very focussed actor who can assume a character and ‘become him’.

Write out a business plan for a school cafeteria that I will run and profit from. The school principal quickly shoots the idea down.Darn it!

We perform the play: Some of the best days of my life. I do a much better job than I ever expected. People actually admire and respect me. The audience likes what I am doing. I matter! I discover one of my greatest passions in life: Defining moment

Begin watching ‘Inside the Actor’s Studio’ and begin to love understanding how actor’s work.

Buy my first self-help book by Tony Robbins. The book has great ideas. I am looking for a quick fix and so don’t put any of the ideas in the book to practical application for many years.

Buy more meditation books, this time from the hippie days. Fail to meditate and achieve Nirvana, again.

Still working out obsessively and getting no results.

Still trying to live a life of significance and feel like I’m getting nowhere physically though I mature tremendously psychologically.

Go through a phase where I am ashamed of my race. Visit the dermatologist and he tells me it is in my genes: Accept it and decide to make the best of my race from then on.

Steal money and pay to be taken through a private meditation session. Relax for about an hour and feel pretty chilled afterwards. Use the rest of the of the stolen money to watch Charlie’s Angels in the cinema’s gold section.

Try working in the church audiovisual department. Great job, but loneliness and isolation gets to me and I leave.

Begin to dream big about being one of the greatest creative minds and servant to my home of Africa: Defining idea.

Drop out of school a couple of months before the end of the year. Run away every school day to the local bookstore where I read books and magazines all day long until my parents and principal discover I have been running away.

Parents don’t put too much of a fight. My father visits Africa and I decide to follow him.

Kenya is fantastic. Missed the feeling of actually being able to talk to someone and form a connection. Talk to everyone I meet and have a fantastically, simple, agenda-less holiday in Kenya. Return to Australia fresh as a battery.

2004

Transfer high schools and end up in a mid-performing high school where on first day we find people smoking outside the school office.

In my first week (again!) get voted in as captain of a sport’s house for the entire school. Don’t show up for meetings! Play sports like I’m paid to be bad! Don’t really care! Hand over my captain badge to a friend of mine who wants to be captain real bad!

Take up five subjects for my final year of high school: Drama, Psychology (only boy in the class), Further Maths, English as a Second Language (it’s my first language but as an immigrant I can take the subject and it’s easier so……) and Dance (only boy in the class)

Quickly realize that by Dance they don’t mean the rhythmic movements of Papa Wemba and Awilo Longomba but instead mean ballet, jazz and contemporary (you ned a tutu for all three).

Take dance lessons in hip hop to see if I can catch up and maybe even get an A+ in the dance exam. Realize that short of a dancing-queen-John-Travoltaesque (you see girl africana, -esque it’s catching on) miracle, passing Dance is never happening. Drop out of dance class and end up doing the minimum subjects allowed in Melbourne schools: 4.

So energetic from coming home that skate right through this year with a nice, steady, comfortable work/study routine.

Begin hanging around other Kenyan immigrants my age: Feels good!

Discover that there is a professional wrestling school – WWE style- right next to my home and I’m in the same class with one of the referees. Referee promises to set me up with training to become a wrestler. One of my Kenyan friends disuades me telling me that one day I will meet an angry man who will knock me upside the head with a chair and make my mind slower than a tranquilized snail…decide to put my WWE plans on hold.

Do well in high school but worse than expected especially in Drama where I expected a pefect score for my one man performance of a South African Freedom figher that moves people to tears. Content but not elated I accept my mark and best student award in Further Maths.

Join a theatre group where I take on the role of the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz. I take playing the melodramatic character seriously. Nominated for a theatre award ( I lost) and sign up with a casting agency. They give me extra work on a TV show and an ad and I get to do a modelling gig on the ourtskirts of the city- the picture at the top of the blog is from that modelling shoot.

Join the Young Australia Broadway Chorus at the semi-advanced level. The Chorus is meant to train musical theatre performers. The training is fantastic. Just like in my first high school production I learn to my dismay, “ I was blessed with a good voice but no skill on how to use it.” The loneliness gets to me and I don’t enjoy the dances we are learning so I drop out after one term.

Realize yet again that I get a lot of admiration and female attention when I perform. Crave that feeling even more.

Try out for the church choir. Again….got’s the talent but no skill. Tell me to come back when I have the talent thing worked out.

Spend my weekends with my Kenyan friends just bumming around and talking. Feel very safe and very comfortable with my friends. In spite of that deal with some minor issues such as mutal friends who decide to slit their wrists when they are in a bit of a bad mood and drunk Maori who gate crashes our party to show us a tattoo where he remembers all the people he has killed.

Watch a friend of mine have more women throw themselves at him than a trampolene. Disgusting to watch as some of us have to work hard in the corner singing, “Can I be your tennis ball,”, to every white girl we see.

If you haven’t make sure you read: Part one / Part two/

Continued on: Part four /Part five

My Story as an African Immigrant:Part two

Mwangi — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 15:19:40 +0000

Before reading this, make sure you read:Part one of my story as an African immigrant.

PART TWO

Second Half of 2002

Land in Australia during 2002 World Cup Finals ( missed the game ). The place is cold though I arrived in shorts and a t-shirt. Excited to be here.
Parents have already selected a high school for me. The school has two Africans, both Kenyans amazingly, in it: one is an absolutely gorgeous girl and the other, a boy, ended up being one of my best friends later on. When we try to take the train from the city to the school, they deem a 2 hours, 40 kilometer train ride as “too far out” ( less than 15 minutes from where the family lives now). Instead chose to leave me in a boarding school more than 100 kilometres outside of the city.
Over the moon that it is a mixed boarding school and proceed to act as though the women in the school are my birthright and making friends is automatic: NOT!
In six months go from the coolest new accessory in the school to social pariah. Christmas season I am alone in a room listening to Neville brothers (that guy’s voice is high!!) sing “These Foolish Things”. Vow to never feel this useless and expendable and unwanted ever again. I will mean something to this world: Defining moment!
As part of work experience at school I get to work at a radio station. First morning I am on air with the host for a short while. Second day I am hosting my own three hour show with two ladies and by the third day I am offered my own youth show every Saturday. Too lonely and distraught to stay: I move back to Melbourne to be with the family.
While home, I begin to try and become a valuable human being by bulking up and losing fat (not knowing it’s quite difficult to do both at the same time). I try working out four hours every day and going on starvation diets. After a couple of days of doing this, I am on the floor crawling because I binge ate so much damn-sweet-it-practically-melted-in-my-mouth-cake.
Become a bodybuilding and health website fanatic and read them everyday. Information very contradictory. Keep pushing weights using diagrams that come with the bench press equipment we bought. Overtrain until I develop stretch marks on both my still-puny arms. Lonely and alone, thank God I have my family!

First Half 2003

Transfer over to a Christian college run by the local church. Everybody knows everybody and almost everyone in the school attends the local church. In retrospect absolutely fantastic people. However, didn’t think so at the time. Follow the events through with me……
Still shaken from the events of 2002, I try to run away from the country in my first week in the school: I intend on stealing my mother’s credit card and flying back to Africa. I tell my mother my plans and she quickly squashes them.
All the kids in my class bully a kid called T who knows he is a loser and acts the part (sadly he ended up going to prison for trying to rob a sex store many years later). I like the guy and become friends with him. Develop disdain for people who bully losers or people who are already down. Don’t think highly of my clasmates at this point.
Begin to learn why some Western men fear women: After answering, “Yes” to the question, “Am I mean?” to a girl who I shall cull, Lulu, assembles all the women in the class to start abusing me. At first, I can handle abuse but fear grips me and I feel I must do something about it. Go into a rage blackout when I see the girl and call her every obscenity this side of the milky way.
One of the things I say to Lulu, “ You don’t know who I am and you don’t know where I came from,” between calling her a female canine many times ( very apologetic in hindsight. If you are reading this,”Lulu”-you know yourslef- I am sorry and I forgive you-she asked me to forgive her 5 years ago).
Get called into the principal’s office: She took the “You don’t know who I am and where I am going.” statement to mean that, like 50 cent, I will bring gangs upon her to beat her. Ideas that will form the Jungle Fever article begin to take root.
After my rage blackout no one wants to be my friend and I lose my only good friend, a girl called N. Alone, lonely, expendable, useless and worthless yet again. I go to work.
I begin to study meditation. Try it and fail one of many times- I was trying to force relaxation (oxymoron if I ever I saw one).
Though I am going to a Christian school, and was raised in the church, I obsessively read a site which explains all the problems with Christianity (apparently the Catholic Church has a book full of bibilical inaccuracies…..scary). Begin studying Eastern religions and philosophies and spend a lot of time feeling like a self-important, self-indulgent philisopher.
After long periods of philisophizing, I come to a conclusion: I don’t know beyond a 100% shadow of a doubt why I was put here. None of us do. I am here. I am blessed. One day my life will matter, because I will make sure it will. May as well make the best of this life. Defining moment!

If you haven’t, make sure you read:Part one.

Continued on: Part three/ Part four/Part five