At 41 years old, I have just recently found myself thinking more seriously about where I am in terms of religion. My parents did not attend church, but it was clear that they believed in God; at what level was unknown. My Dad’s parents took me to Southern Baptist church where I became very involved from about age 7 through 16. I was quite consumed with the church and obeyed their teachings.

It was at age 16 that I began to wonder about whether I was following the right path. There was no encouragement from “outside” — It just occurred to me one day that I had blindly followed that path without any consideration for other options. However, my excursion into finding my true religion did not consider any other paths outside of Christianity. I found myself settling for non-denominational churches. In my late 20’s, I stopped attending churches of any kind on a regular basis.

I basically just stopped thinking about religion. I tended to avoid religious conversations. About the time I hit age 34, I went to work at a place where there were many different types of faiths among the employees there — anything from strict Roman Catholic to Agnostic to Atheist. I worked there for 5 years and man, it really woke me up to what’s really out there in terms of religion. Since then, I have done a lot of reading in addition to the great discussions I had with those people of various faiths.

At this point, I feel like I have evolved into something like what you describe here, although I still haven’t completely pinpointed it. I don’t think a person in my position ever fully settles on an exact religion, but I think “Agnostic Christian” fits me pretty well. Of all the reading I have done, and the thinking I’ve done about myself, I think your article really hit home for me. I want to thank you for the inspiration and now the desire to dig deeper.

Sorry for the long-winded post, but I hope that maybe this will help someone else. It does seem like most people have fully decided on a religion by their mid-20’s, and I thought the folks posting here might find it interesting that a dude in his 40’s such as myself can still be so dynamic in terms of religion.

Thanks again to all for the great article and follow-up comments.

As to Christian institution. Hi Pink M, I think Jesus and his first followers did not require intellectual suicide. Paul said that “If Jesus did not rise from the dead we are of all [people] most to be pitied”. Ie. Christianity is open to falsification.

This leads to a good deal of discussion in contemporary western philosophy (and a much longer tradition of reflection in the enlightenment traditions of Hinduism, Buddhism and Taoism). The question I would put as: is the intellect adequate to comprehend truth/reality (and how and if truth and reality are different). This is especially discussed in modern western philosophy by existentialism and phenomenology. I especially like Robert Pirsig’s Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (the true is a part of the good). My own approach is that our perceptions are educated and do bear a relation to what is. The most useful approach I find is Perls, Hefferline and Goodman’s Gestalt Therapy. Hope this makes sense.

As a guide, ( and not to let anyone free to ignore consequences ), consider that in the OT, one could not be a rabbi until age 30. Also, of those Israelites who left, those below age 24 were given blanket pardon for any wrong doing in the desert.

Bringing up kids
-Fear, mostly no, sometimes yes, depending on the age.( e.g. “Mwangi, if you cross the road without first looking left-right-left- you will be crushed”). Love always. But not that love that does not have any consequences. Love that cares, gives freedom, yet does not hold too much.

In any case, every child is unique. There should be no blanket “this is how to raise kids” type of rules. Any parent who has the right presence of mind, is a reasonable person, and loves his kids, should have no problem in raising them well. But, in those cases where there are great doubts, i think the bible (especially NT) is a good model to use. But again, it is never right to force ideas on people, even kids. You can generally drag along 6/8/11/15 year olds wherever you want them to go ( for their benefits, say, for example, i do not know anyone who is not glad that their parents forced them to go to school or that they got some a.. whooping for stealing ), but as parents realise that their kids are coming of age, they should be able re-evaluate their methods and learn what methods work and which do not.

Talking of using the Bible as a model:
I know there are many other ideas out there, and people are free to choose whatever they feel comfortable with. I think some reasons why kids do not take kindly to some of those ideas from the bible is because the parents/authority figures propagating these ideals do not themselves live up to what they expect of the young. But i think if they were always honest, not hiding behind the cloth or “i am the parent” or ” i am the teacher/president”, but acknowledging whenever we fail, it should be okay.

What is the best way, if you wish for your child to grow up in Christ all their life, for you to impart the message to them?

Fear? Love? A mixture? Tailor each message to each child?

There is such a thing as age of accountability-that is, when someone gets to be able to know the difference between good and evil, Really know. This varies from individual to individual. I doubt anyone less than 18 really really knows what is good and and what is bad. I hazard a guess: 24 is the magic #.

Therefore, it is disastrous to put a burden of being born-again to 6-year olds, and people who have not yet reached that magic age. Some younger people may do well, but i think it is a great mistake the church now pays for. I mean, God is good, how nice would He be to be telling a 6-year old about hell and burning and such stuff? Anyone, with that kind of threat, would be shoved into heaven, not so?.

This gentlemen, is the proper way to be born again:

-You have the mind and presence to be able to look at the world, your life and think: this world is surely full for nice pleasures. It is also full of so much evil. The pleasures are so short-lived. The evil so enduring. Is there anything else better than ALL these?

And when confronted with the teaching of Christ, which basically says
“Hey, I have a better way. You can partner with me in easing the evils you see around you. But to work with me, it requires you do let go of some of the goodies in life and to be like me. Are you willing to come on board?”

Now, when one comes to that point, they are at a position to make a good life choice. A career type of choice. The type of choice that you do not walk from easily. I think a 24+ year old can make that kind of a choice soberly.