I am happy that you have found romance in Africa. Your reply to Mwangi’s jungle fever has shown that Mwangi needs to increase his list of ‘white’ women more susceptible to having jungle fever. You are beautiful, have self confidence, are not over weight and don’t do drugs.Permit me if I still believe that Mwangi must have left something out.

I would like to address briefly also about the non straightforward approach you have noticed in your dealings with your African lover. Different does not mean negative. I once read that drinking ethic is as important to an Irish man as work ethic. Americans who have tried to or succeeded in establishing businesses in China would agree that doing business there is quite different. Frustrating especially to the American who is always upfront and in your face. Your boyfriend however, probably may have misused the saying that there is no straight road in Africa. One of the keys to understanding a saying or a proverb is to understand the context, whether the proverb is used in the first person or second person and whether the proverb is a reply to a rebuke…….anyway not to bore you with more technicalities, what I am saying is that you need to try and understand the underlying meanings in African communication.

And don’t pay heed to Mwangi’s wet blanket. I believe that if you have really found the one, then both of you will be able to find your way around the stereotypes and maze of societally imposed differences to Uhuru!

And to Jennifer, your exposition on aesthetics is very interesting. I hope that Mwangi took note of the fact that you are one ‘white’ woman who actually find black skin comely. Are there many like you or are you different? The perception of beauty in my opinion goes deeper than something caused by ignorance. A person perceives beauty in his/her soul instinctively that this or that is beautiful. Even when society tells you otherwise, you will not change your perception of beauty.

Perhaps, your training as a nurse has enabled you to appraise the issue of aesthetics beyond the ephemeral. But that is my opinion.

My question finally is: Is black really beautiful? Do we say that black is beautiful because we don’t want to hurt ourselves beyond the slave stripes. Do ‘white’ people feel black is beautiful? Do ‘black’ people feel that white is beautiful? Do we believe that the answer we would get is probably because of some colonial chip inserted by the colonizer?

As Cheeze remarked about straight answers; I believe that there are no straight questions in the world.

Let me tell you something about women which is the only thing you will ever need to know about women. 99% of everything that women say is a lie. Let me repeat that, 99% of everything that a woman ever says is a lie. The only time that a woman ever tells the truth is when she is scared shitless.

Now, realize that the media is an extension of women. Meaning this, 99% of everything you see in the media is a lie. The other 1% is a misinterpretation. Nothing you see in the media contains truth. Nothing.

Having said that, let me speak of the 4 main lies that women tell.

1. Manipulative lies: They tell these lies when they want you to ACT in a certain way. These lies are therefore social in nature. Therefore, when you are in a social setting (party na kadhalika), everything women say a lie. Manipulative lie. Other arenas where women use manipulative lying are the internet and also emails and also cell phones/phones. When you interact with women in social settings or through any of the mediums I have described, know that everything they say is a manipulative lie. When a woman says anything and you feel insecure, know that she is telling a manipulative lie. Know that they are telling you these lies when they speak nicely too you.

2. Outright lying: These lies are political in nature. Meaning that they have to do with issues pertaining to power and hierarchies and control. They have mostly to do with relationship issues when a woman wants to control you to do as she wants done. Basically to enslave you by putting fear into you. Thats what these lies are about, putting fear into you. If a woman says anything and you feel doubt, know she is telling an outright lie. Know that they are telling you these lies when they speak sweetly to you.

3. Witholding info: This is the third type of lie that women tell. It is basically about not telling you the whole truth and leaving out information. So, if you asked a woman how many men she has slept with and she says 5 when she has slept with 20, it is not really a lie. She is just withholding info based on forcibly misinterpreting what one means by the word sleep. These lies are told by women when it comes to family issues and issues with friends. By friends I am speaking of her friends. They also tell these lies when it comes to money issues. They tell these lies so as to confuse you so that you may not suspect anything is up with them. You think they are nice and innocent. When a woman tells you this lie, you will feel angry. If you do feel angry when a woman is speaking to you, know she is telling this type of lie. Know that they are telling this lie when they speak smoothly or in a low tone to you. Women are most likely to tell you these lies when in a car or when you are doing something and are not able to concentrate fully on what she is saying.

4. Misleading lies: These are the last type of lies that women tell. They are lies basically about themselves/character and also about you as a person/character and your friends too. They do this so as to put you down and make you believe that she is a Goddess and a perfect person and that it is you and your friends who have issues. They do this so that you may seek their acceptance. When woman tell this type of lie, you are bound to feel shocked. Women tell you these lies by speaking softly and with a hint of disgust. Women are most likely to tell you these lies when you are watching TV together.

Those are the only 4 lies that they tell. When a woman speaks the truth, she is acting the way nyangau women act naturally. Meaning she will act the way westernized/feminized men act and speak. She will also be hysterical.

Do realize that when women say the lies above, they are basically projecting their issues onto you or men in general. When they tell you that you do not act cool (manipulative lying), they have issues about being cool. You will realize if you analyze them that they are the biggest nerds/shaos ever.

When women tell you these lies, this is how you one should basically react to offset them.

1. Manipulative lying: Since they speak nicely to you when they tell these lies, simply stare back at them. One can also choose to simply ignore them, a form of staring. They will stop talking and walk away.

2. Outright lying: They will speak with a sweet tone when they tell you these lies. You on the other hand act as though you do not care. They will give up. Sigh alot.

3. Withholding info: They will speak smoothly and in a low tone. You speak harshly and in a high tone. They will get confused about what they are saying.

4. Misleading lies: When they tell you these lies, they will speak softly and with a hint of disgust. You on the other hand should act surprised like you just heard someone say something nonsensical. Speak in a deep voice too.They will shut up.

You have to understand something, you have been lied to that women are good at sensing things. That they have stronger feelings than men. Thats a total lie. Strong feelings come from the masculine/aggression force. There are many types of feelings but we are speaking of feelings that enable you to sense ones physical/direct environment. Feelings that enable you to sense danger. As I said before, women depend mostly on information and spying to know whats going on. Men on the other hand can take in data from their direct/physical environment and figure out whats going on. Like a detective. So a man can enter another persons house and just by observing the environment, know whats up with the guy. Women cannot do this, they have to depend on spying.

Nothing nyangau women ever say is the truth. One can know this by noticing that women only know how to act in 5 ways: nicely, sweetly, smoothly/moody, softly/kindly and niggardly(real female mode of behaviour before training). Have you ever seen a woman with any other type of personality? Niiambie yuko wapi and I will show you a cool chick. Know that these women are very predictable and lack any creativity and intelligence.

Here is some AFRICAN-American rhyming for you. Not to be confused with bitch ass nigger/black rap music (akina snoop na tupac).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-GBcjDwDF8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfE9cCgM_Ys

As far as the losing the ‘good woman’ theory, your answer was proof that she was not the right marriage material for you. That truth probably holds the same for your peers. So, maybe the rhetoric of being a ‘good woman’ is not as important as knowing that she was not the right woman for you.

Love & Respect!

@Mwangi- My questions about African women who marry caucasian men are
1) How prevalent is this?
2) What are the chances or possibilites that those women are doing it out of the same reasons a African man would marry a caucasian women (ie.. paper marriages ect)?

Also, if the woman is doing it out of love or to defy the laws of the patriarical society of Africa (because she wants to change the course of
her personal destiny); 3) Was she the right woman for you or your peers? Did you lose a good woman?