Part two of the 10 things I wish I knew before I landed in Australia
I know some of you are probably wondering why I released Part 7 of the series before I released Part 2.The reason is pretty simple: I couldn’t write part two. This is my fifth attempt at writing this article. For some reason, I just couldn’t seem to write this post in a way that ‘felt real’ to me and that I felt would serve at the same time.
Eventually, in the middle of the night, I had an epiphany: I have two younger sisters who have grown up in a world dominated by hip hop. Therefore, I decided I would share with you the conversation that I as a big brother would have with my little sisters.This post will basically be some quick superficial observations on the negative effects that gangsta rap/hardcore rap and it’s message have had on young African women of today.
First up a video that basically sums up a lot of my attitudes regarding hardcore rap.
(NB: A lot of profanity in this video. Please bear with it in order to hear the message. He is pretty on point in terms of getting my point across)
Gangsta Rap Disrespects Women
The MASC: The Men Aint S… Club
I couldn’t end this article without talking about the MASC. If any of you have been around long enough you know what I’m talking about. This is the club where women get together, usually single or just out of a relationship, with the intention of drinking like alcohol is being banned tomorrow.While in a drunken stupour they talk VERY LOUDLY about:
1) How men “aint worth a damn thing”
2) How men are dogs
3) What’s wrong with men? Also: Why aren’t there any good men?
The next phase of the discussion is the equally loud independent women encouragement session:
1) You look Good girl
2) You are the prize. They don’t deserve you
3) Hell yeah you look God with your hair like that. Wear that weave with pride girl
Then the evening ends with them swearing off men as children of Lucifer before walking off as strong, independent women. Until they meet a smooth-talking, gold-tooth brother down the road. Then, it’s rinse and repeat…..
Now it is quite unfortunate that majority of women that I have known in a variety of age groups have had similar discussions at some point. What sets the MASC apart is that when they are having man problems, EVERY ONE has to know.The inner drama queen has to come out and let the whole world know that for the next few weeks, men are lower than slugs swimming in bile because she just made another man find his stuff, “to the left, to the left.”
What Does All This Have to Do With Hip Hop?
In my observation and experience, almost all women who are members of the MASC listen to two types of musical artist:
1) Hardcore hip hop artists or other artists who have pretty misogynistic messages in their music.
2) Other women who are members of the MASC and promote the messages of the MASC. A typical MASC album:
Song 1 – We met at a club
Song 2- We left the club together
Song 3 -We made love and fell in love
Song 4 – I was shouting from the rooftops that, “I am so in love.”
Song 5 – I heard that he was creeping……
Song 6- Busted! Found him cheating on me
Song 7 – Oh Lord, the world is coming to an end. He cheated on me
Song 8- To hell with him, I am going to slash his tires, insult him all over the Internet and then all will be right with the world
Song 9 – So I’m back in the club with my girls…………
How to Leave the MASC
If you are reading this and you are a member of the MASC, let me talk to you on a serious tip. Here are seven little steps you can take to get rid of your MASC membership:
First: Almost all members of the MASC pick up their ‘no good, lousy, cheating….’ brothers in clubs. Now, in case this wasn’t already clear, men do not go to the club to have deep intellectual conversations on existentialism with their soul mates. As far as most men are concerned, and most women if they are honest, clubs as butcheries and meat markets where you go searching for body parts to fulfill your carnal desires. So, if you are going to the clubs expecting to meet the next Steve Biko or find the black Confucius; probably not the best place to look.
Second: A lot of women will go for men who are not good for them because, well, ‘bad boys’ are pretty damn exciting.My advice: find other ways to fulfill your desire for excitement WITHOUT having someone steal your pride. Below I have listed a few things you can do to bring excitement to your life:
a) Become a high school teacher b) Go skydiving c) Go work on bringing peace to the Palestine-Israel conflict d) Go to Kenya and assist those displaced from their homes e) Kayaking down rivers with rapids f) Bungee jumping g) Go to a theme park h) Go work in the ghettos throughout the world to educate the youth i) Go to the local arcade and get in touch with your inner child by playing video games j) Go climb a mountain,(Hint:The taller the more thrilling) h) Go try to become the first woman to penetrate an area that is male dominated-my mother is a building foreman to give you a clue of the possibilities i) Become a day trader in the share market j) Join the circus and on and on and on.
Thirdly, I have been around long enough and seen enough to know, 99% of the time that a man comes to talk to you, especially in a club or party, he wants to sleep with you. Might not be politically correct to say, but I think if you adopt this belief it is much more in line with reality. So, basically ladies, you have all the power to chose from all those men who come to talk to you expecting a piece of the pie.Please chose wisely.
Fourth: Raise your standards regarding the type of people you will associate with. Then, make sure you rise up to meet those standards. If you only want a well educated man, muscled up man with an IQ above 130, you had better not be dragging around XXXL love handles and have on your resume that the most interesting thing you can talk about is how, “Asian women wish they had this behind.”You want quality? Then step up and become quality.
Fifth: Women are 100s of times more intuitive to this stuff than men so I know there is very little I have shared that is new. I know that most of you can tell pretty early on when you have a good one and when you have a ‘low down, dirty, cheating…….’.So please go for the good ones. Don’t sell yourself short,alright?
Sixth: In my experience and studies, almost all anger in the area of relationships, even when we direct it at other people, ultimately comes down to feeling hurt. Chances are that by the time you are getting together with your girls to reform the MASC, you are feeling a lot of pain and have beaten yourself up a lot of times on the inside. So, should you basically make the wrong choice and chose someone whose no good, don’t beat yourself up for it. Learn from it. Accept it as a divine gift or lesson; your are being taught who and what to avoid in future. Acknowledge that you are hurt and take time to heal yourself. Then go out there and help heal a few other women who are also going through pain in this area. I have heard it said that any problem you are going through quickly fades when you help other people solve it.
Seven: Finally, to tie it all back in. Switch off the garbage. Stop listening to music from bitter, angry misogynistic men or heartbroken, lonely women. If you want love in your life, listen to love music (What a concept?) If you want peace, listen to the Lucianos, the India Aries, the Bob Marleys, the Kirk Franklins and the Lucky Dubes of the world who preach messages of peace and togetherness.
Four Keys to Life:Fix One
What you put in your mind on a regular basis? Who you spend your time with? What you think about regualrly? Where you spend your time? These four things tend to be pretty good predictors of the type of life you will live. Change just one of these four, what you put into your mind on a regular basis, and you get the ball rolling and you won’t even be able to imagine where this one change can take you (more on this in later posts).
(WOW! You know I have just realized that I never have a clue what I will write until I write it.) So, that’s basically the big brother discussion I would have with my little sisters. My hope is that this article and all the other articles I write are of benefit to you. Whether or not they are contact me at email@example.com and let me know what’s on your mind so future articles can be more in line with the information you need. If you want to share this article with others please click the ‘Bookmark’ symbol below to submit it to social bookmarking sites. Otherwise, you can link back to my article from your blog and write your thoughts on it. If all that is too much work just leave a comment at the end of this article and let me know how this article has affected you.
Till then be blessed and go out and be a blessing to others,